He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
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