Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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