I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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