I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
