I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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