So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
