I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
