the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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