In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Floor bacon is actually really good
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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