I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
