he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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