Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize
