im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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