never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
