I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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