Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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