He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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