i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
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