i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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