Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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