She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
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