So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
