Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
