I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
