She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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