she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
