Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
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