Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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