need another drink. this is the easiest way
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
