So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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