Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
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