How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
the night ended with taco bell and tears
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Randomize