Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
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