Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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