Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Randomize
