We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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