I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Randomize
