Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
