i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
