bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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