I hate your face
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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