He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
