yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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