Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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