i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
