LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
