I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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