That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize
