If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Bang-toberfest begins!!
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Randomize
