Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
My first STD was from a foam party
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
How does one acquire holy water?
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
