I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
