She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize