Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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