??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
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